A Test

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Official Announcement

A few of those that read this have already heard the news. My engagement to Tommy is now officially over. After some personal things came to light during the recent weeks in our relationship, I felt it was best for us to follow our own, different paths apart. I still love him dearly, but this is one of those things in life where we are just not meant to be. Please understand that even though I realize all of this, I am still "grieving" and need some time to accept it myself. Love y'all!

Useless Thoughts For The Day

The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.

Do you realize that in about 40 years, we'll have thousands of little old ladies running around with tattoos?

Money can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than in a Hyundai.

Drinking makes some husbands see double and feel single.

Living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween.

After a certain age, if you don't wake up aching in every joint, you are probably dead.

Anything for a Man's Ego

Thank you, Cyndi, for this cute funny

In The Spirit of Thanksgiving

This was too cute for me to pass up. Thanks again, Cyndi, for the funny!

Save the Turkeys! lol

Halloween Pictures

I will be posting the kid's Halloween costume pictures soon once the film is developed. Keep checking back!

A Deeper Look at Science

A physics professor had written a take home exam for his graduatestudents. It had only one question:"Is Hell endothermic or exothermic? Support your answer with a proof."Most of the students wrote simple proofs using Boyle's Law or somevariant. One student, however, wrote the following:------First, if we postulate that souls do exist, then they must possess somemass. If so, then a mole of souls also possesses a certain mass. So, atwhat rate are souls moving into Hell and at what rate are souls leaving?I think we may safely assume that once a soul reaches Hell, it will notbe leaving. Therefore, no souls leave Hell.As for the souls entering Hell, we need to examine the religions of theworld. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member, youwill go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions andpeople generally do not belong to more than one religion, we can projectthat all people and, therefore, all souls, go to Hell.With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of soulsin Hell to increase at an exponential rate.We then need to examine the rate of change to the volume of Hell itself.Boyle's Law states that in order for the pressure and temperature toremain constant, the ratio of the mass of souls to the volume of Hellmust remain constant.Thus..[A] If Hell is expanding a slower rate than the rate of the mass of soulsaccumulating in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will increaseuntil all Hell finally breaks loose, making Hell exothermic.[B] Conversely, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increaseof the mass of the souls accumulating in Hell, then the temperature andpressure will drop until Hell eventually freezes over, making Hellendothermic.If we accept the postulate given to me by Theresa Banyan during myfreshman year that "it will be a cold day in hell before I ever sleepwith you", and taking into account the fact that I still have notsucceeded in establishing intimate relations with her, then [B] cannot betrue.Therefore, Hell is exothermic.-----The student got the only A.

A Joke From Cyndi

Ralph and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital.
One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Ralph jumped into the deep end.

He sank to the bottom of the pool. Edna jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Ralph out. When the Head Nurse heard of Edna's heroic act she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, since she now considered her to be mentally stable.

The nurse went to tell Edna the news, "Edna, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by saving the life of another patient. The bad news is, right after you saved him, Ralph hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt. I am so sorry, but he's dead."

Edna replied "He didn't hang himself. I hung him there to dry. So when do I go home?

Speaking of Mammograms..... Here's a Funny!

Thank GOD my Mammogram was nothing like this poor lady's was!

"The First Time's Always the Worst"

The first mammogram is the worst. Especially when the machine catches on fire. That's what happened to me. The technician, Gail, positioned me exactly as she wanted me (think a really complicated game of Twister - right hand on the blue, left shoulder on the yellow, right breast as far away as humanly possible from the rest of your body). Then she clamped the machine down so tight, I think my breast actually turned inside out. I'm pretty sure Victoria's Secret doesn't have a bra for that. Suddenly, there was a loud popping noise. I looked down at my right breast to make sure it hadn't exploded. Nope, it was still flat as a pancake and still attached to my body. "Oh, no!" Gail said loudly. These are perhaps, the words you least want to hear from any health professional. Suddenly, she came flying past me, her lab coat whipping behind her, on her way out the door. She yelled over her shoulder, "The machine's on fire, I'm going to get help!" OK, I was wrong, 'The machine's on fire,' are the worst words you can hear from a health professional. Especially if you're all alone and semi-permanently attached to A MACHINE and don't know if it's THE MACHINE in question. I struggled for a few seconds trying to get free, but even Houdini couldn't have escaped. I decided to go to plan B: yelling at the top of my lung (the one that was still working). I hadn't seen anything on fire, so my panic hadn't quite reached epic proportions. But then I started to smell smoke coming from behind the partition. "This is ridiculous," I thought. I can't die like this. What would they put in my obituary? Cause of death: breast entrapment? I may have inhaled some fumes because I started to hallucinate. An imaginary fireman rushed in with a fire hose and a hatchet. "Howdy, ma'am," he said. "What's happened here?" he asked, averting his eyes. "My breasts were too hot for the machine," I quipped, as my imaginary fireman ran out of the room again. "This is gonna take the Jaws of Life!" In reality, Gail returned with a fire extinguisher and put out the fire. She gave me a big smile and released me from the machine. "Sorry! That's the first time that's ever happened. Why don't you take a few minutes to relax before we finish up?" I think that's what she said. I was running across the parking lot in my backless paper gown at the time. After I'd relaxed for a few years, I figured I might go back. But I was bringing my own fire extinguisher. The end.

Doctor's Appointment

This morning was my Mammogram appointment which I SO looked forward to (Sarcasm is another service I provide). I went to a different doctor this time to have the procedure done than the last Mammogram I had 4 years ago and I am glad I did. This time around I was fortunate enough to have a nurse that did not attempt to make pancakes out of my breasts! I can honestly say that it was a fairly painless procedure. Woooo hoooo! I'm good for another few years hopefully.

Don't forget to get your checkup or remind the important women in your lives to get checked! Prevention is the best weapon we have!

Ok, I'm off my soap box now........